12 weeks

And here we are at 12 weeks. What a day. But what got me through the day was the fact I was going to hear Lil Berger's heartbeat. And we did hear it and it was amazing. All the emotions that I was holding in all day just flooded out. My doctor seemed used to the crying but the second we heard the whoosh, the tears came rushing. After that, it was back to work where I gushed to everyone.

The appointment went pretty fast. She just checked everything and boy does a pap smear hurt when you're pregnant. Yikes.

I'm too tired to write anyone. I think I need a day at the spa. Don't you?

You know you're expecting when ...

... you wake up at 2 a.m. with hunger in your belly. Grapes and toast work wonders.

Documenting your baby’s life

First off, let me just say, I don’t get the whole scrap booking phenomenon. I have friends and family that spend hours on end documenting their lives in little acid free photo books. I have barely had time to even put a wedding album together or something about our first house. With that being said I do want to document Lil Berger’s and our family’s life. So what’s my solution -- Digital scrapbooking.

Why digital scrapbooking? Because I’m a gal of the future, it’s cheap and what better way to keep my design skills going and improve my productivity at work (of course, I won’t be designing at work, this will be at home). I’m ½ of the way there with having photoshop and a digital camera now I just need to download InDesign and Acrobat (I think) for my computer at home and buy a new, nicer printer. My current computer won’t read my printer. Unless I figure out how to fix it, I might need a new one.

I guess I’ll add this to my list of things to do! Fun, huh?

But I don’t feel pregnant

I’m not sick to my stomach anymore but I’m mostly tired and hungry. I’m in that weird phase where I don’t have morning sickness but I’m not showing. I often forget I’m having a baby until I get up to go to the bathroom four times a night. Having morning sickness was reassurance that I was pregnant and a good reminder to take it easy but now that I’m just mostly hungry and tired it almost doesn’t seem real. I’ve been worried about my little fig. I don’t have any reason to be worried but I’m worrying. I hope my fig is OK. Some people say the worrying starts now until the child is 50! Ha!

I’ll get some reassurance this Thursday when we go to hear the heartbeat until then I will keep thinking positive thoughts that figgy is growing strong and healthy.

Connecting anyway we can

My 9 year old niece lives in the Midwest. I only get to see her once a year, maybe. She is at the point where she reads and writes and wants a myspace page. Good thing my brother and sister-in-law are smart enough to not let her get a myspace page. She does play on the computer though and when I was visiting, I showed her meez.com where you go and make little animated dolls that look like you or whatever you want it to look like. I gave her my account info so every couple of days I can go in and she can go in and update the little doll. We spent hours changing the little girl around while I was visiting. Every couple of days I get little surprises like this one:


That's the one she made me for Thanksgiving. It made me cry because I really miss my family around the holidays and esp since they aren't around to witness all the changes around me.

Then I started thinking ... maybe I should do some YouTube.com movies or start posting photos (as much as I hate the way I look in photos). That way my family could not only read but see what's going on.

Fun, huh?

Size of a fig! Yeah!

Today marks week 11 for Lil Berger. In 6 days, we have our first appointment with our OB where we will hear Lil Bergers heartbeat! The morning sickness has subsided. I just pee alot and am tired all the time.

Thanksgiving was well, weird. We had a wonderful celebration at our friend's house. It's what happened after that basically ruined our Thanksgiving. That's all I will say, I'm trying to keep this blog positive. I just wish we lived closer to my family and my husband's in Arizona. That's all I'm saying. Today I'm emotionally drained and depressed.

This week's activity is the reach out to other moms. "Women who've already made the transition to motherhood can offer good advice, a comforting shoulder, and the camaraderie of shared experiences.If you don't know where to start the conversation, ask your mom or a friend to tell you about her best and worst pregnancy memories."

So share your stories moms! I wanna hear them.

Week 10 Activity: undies & bra

This week's BabyCenter.com activity was to buy new maternity undies and bras. Motherhood had a sale on undies and honestly -- they look and feel just like regular undies. Strange, huh?

Dreams

We are back from our weekend away in the forest. It rained the whole weekend so it meant staying in and watching movies in the cabin with the fireplace blazing away. It was really nice. I just relaxed and finally read my pregnancy magazines, took naps, ate junk food -- it was nice. What would have been made it nicer was if the rain would have turned to snow. It was surprisingly 5 degrees too hot for that.

On Friday night, I had the strangest dream. In my dream, my mother was picking out furniture for her home. She basically had a furniture store in the basement and I went through and helped her. My mom was never good at interior decorating (same with me) so she thought two heads were better than one. As we walked through the items, she had several cribs and changing tables and said "pick one out for the baby -- it's on me." I woke up and told my husband at breakfast. He really didn't saw much. Maybe it's a message. Maybe it's nothing but it was freaky. I often have dreams like this and usually I say "Mom but you're dead" but I didn't this time.

I'm having anxiety about a bunch of things -- all money related. We have a large IRS payment to make in January and I'm worried about maternity leave and making ends meat. I think I need to re-read The Secret and just stop worrying. Everything will fall into place. It always does.

Morning sickness wasn't so bad this weekend. Maybe because of all the naps and junk food?

Looking forward to the 3 day work week. Woo hoo.

Happy Fetus Day

Today, Lil Berger has reached the fetal stage -- the 10 week mark!!! This morning, I even told the dog "Happy Fetus Day, Charlie." My husband just chuckled. Like the dog really cares.

I've been feeling sick off and on. I'm a late bloomer to morning sickness, apparently. Nothing sounds good to eat but I force myself. Bagels -- yum! Yogurt -- yum but gives me a metallic taste. For lunch I brought apples, banana and chocolate Zingers. Yesterday it was a salad, tamales and piece of key lime pie. Weird combos, I know.

Well, again -- Happy Fetus Day!

I didn't post this so you'd feel sorry for me

Today I ventured to the local shopping area to look at maternity tops. I don't intend to buy any tops for another two weeks but I just wanted to see what was out there. We don't have too many maternity options in Bend -- maybe three places. So while I looked, another girl was with her mom looking for a winter maternity coat. Her mother was really cute, giving her jacket after jacket. to try on I began reflecting on how my own mother would act. I even thought to myself "gee, if that was my mother, she'd buy the coat for me." She was just that kinda mother.

Usually, reflecting on my mom wouldn't upset me but being hormonal, it did. I came to turns with my mother's untimely death years ago. I don't cry over my mom's death. After 12 years, tears are just wasted because there is nothing I can change. I watched the mother and daughter and felt really jealous and then the mom bought the winter coat for the daughter. I had to get out of there.

Just to be blunt, it royally sucks that my mom isn't here to help or answer questions. I have aunts I can call or friends I could ask but nothing can compare to your mother. I know everything will be ok but it can't I just how bad it sucks.

I think I'm done with my rant.

ANYWAY, I did find two pairs of J. Jill Wearever pants on sale that will come in really handy over the next few months. My boss won't have to question my fashion sense.

Forget decorating the house, there's a baby on the way

Today I’m feeling surprisingly good. No upset tummy. No near vomiting episodes. Just tired with a sore chest (probably TMI but who cares, this is my blog). Of course, the worries all start because some women believe that no more morning sickness is a sign of that dreaded m word I won’t type.

ANYWAY … I love my husband. He’s creative and funny. I’m creative but more reasonable one of the bunch. When he found out we were having a baby he exclaimed that he was going to paint the room for the baby. I was hoping he would want to wait but when I went to Omaha to visit family, he practically dropped me off and the airport and headed to Lowes to pick out a color. When I got home, first thing I did was run into the room to see the color he wanted to surprise me with. It’s yellow or cocoa butter to him. He had this grand idea to paint a mural which I quickly squashed. My reason was more because I don’t want to have to paint the room before we sell our. We settled on white chair rail and either a lavender or blue for the lower half. Instead of painting a mural, I’m going to buy him some canvas and paints and he can paint his heart out for the baby.

I want the general theme to be sun, moon and stars. I already have wall art from my Nebraska home (it was the theme in my old bedroom). I like this crib set but it won’t work for a boy. It looks girly. My husband isn’t too keen on the sun, moon, stars theme but I think he’ll warm up to it.

I did find a crib and changing table on IKEA. I told myself no ordering until after Jan. 1. Spending money for me is like pulling teeth since I like to save but I don’t think I’ll mind getting the baby some things.

I need to find more ways of including my husband. Anyone have other ideas?

Just what my baby needs

shes having a baby posted about this so I thought I would share something my baby really needs ....

WILCO ONESIE or a BIB. You can order them here.








You know you want to buy my baby one.

Website to put in your RSS feed

... or bookmark.

Sugar Publishing has added a new addition to their family ... Lil Sugar ... just in time for my baby. The Sugar sites are some of my favorites to visit in blogland. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Kudos to me

Yay! I went to the gym and I feel great! I worked out on the elliptical for 30 mins. It was tough but I got through it!

So while working out I thought about the hopes and dreams I have for Lil Berger. I hope Lil Berger isn't a fussy baby that sleeps through the night and that she/he is a happy baby.

Off to relax after my workout.

No whitty title. I might just throw up my lunch

Most women experience morning sickness at weeks 6-7. I thought I was getting off the hook until this morning at work. I felt like I was going to lose my morning bagel. Since I worked part of the weekend, I headed home at noon to take a nap. I really needed to eat something. Normally, I watch what I eat -- veggies, fruit, protein and whole wheat. You know what I had for lunch -- a KFC Popcorn Chicken Bowl and a KFC biscuit. This would be something I would never put in my mouth. Guess what -- it made me feel better until now. I feel the same way. Let's see if ginger ale calms the stomach.

Not feeling too attractive, either. My clothes, esp my pants aren't fitting. Mostly because of bloating. My eye brows are out of control and my contacts are bugging me so I'm wearing glasses. I think that on my day off after Thanksgiving, I'm going to clean out my closet and put away the maternity clothes my friend gave me. I have about 20 pairs of pants but only a handful of tops.

It's a gloomy day in Bend. The gloomy weather forced me to turn up the heat and take a nap with the dog on the couch. I think it's about time to take another. I'm falling asleep. Ain't pregnancy grand?

I'll have a virgin margarita please

I'm into ordering virgin drinks. Since I am not drinking my usual wine because of the pregnancy, when my husband and I go out to eat, I'm ordering drinks that contain no alcohol but look like adult beverages. I was craving a Red Cactus Margarita last week and settled for sweet and sour mix on the rocks sans the tequila. It was tooooo sweet. Yes, Miss Sweet Tooth says it's too sweet. There was no such thing in my vocabulary before this pregnancy.

This is week 9 (well, 9 weeks, 2 days. I've heard my embryo size is over an inch or the size of a grape. On Friday, my Lil Berger will be a fetus, reaching the 10 week mark! YAY! My husband and I will be celebrating by taking a quick trip to one of our favorite spots -- Camp Sherman, OR. We always rent a cabin in the middle of Ponderosa Pines along the Metolius River in the fall. What do we do for fun? Play cards, watch movies by the fire, take a hike -- plan and simple -- we relax. No phone coverage, no computers -- just the husband, dog and I. Since this is an annual tradition, next year we'll be bringing baby with us.

Baby Center's activity for week 9 is start a daily ritual to connect with your baby. According to their website:

Diane Sanford, a clinical psychologist who focuses on pregnancy and postpartum adjustment, encourages women to set aside two five- to ten-minute periods a day to think about their baby. Just after waking up and before going to sleep works well for many expectant moms. During these times, sit quietly and gently rest your hands on your belly. Focus on your breathing and then start thinking about your baby (your hopes and dreams, your intentions as a parent, etc.). It's a great way to initiate the bonding process and to help you plan for the kind of parent you want to be.

So what are my dreams for my little "grape?" Since I've seen this activity, I've found myself daydreaming about Lil Bergers life (mainly because I fall asleep on the couch and then sleep walk to the bed). I dream about how strong and healthy my baby is growing inside me. I dream that my baby will be smart and beautiful. I dream that my baby will grow up to be a successful doctor, attorney or engineer. I dream that we're a close knit family. I think about family vacations and my Lil Berger playing with cousins. I could go on and on and on about this but I will keep some things to myself.

Morning sickness is starting to subside. For the first time in over a month, I walked to dog. We were both pooped after our 3 mile walk. I plan on going to the gym tomorrow and looking into swimming classes at our local pool. I want to be healthy during this pregnancy. I guess I'll start with exercising and then maybe the eating healthy thing will fall into place (after morning sickness subsides).

Now, off to watch the Simpsons and drink my Peligrino over ice instead of a glass of wine.

We have a heartbeat

I had an ultrasound to determine the due date and we were spot on though I really was beginning to think we conceived in August but no, it was September. My husband met me at work (I work in a medical center) for the ultrasound and it was the most amazing 20 mins of this year (that is compared to finding out I was pregnant and the Wilco concert in August). I had a regular ultrasound and a vaginal one and got to see the little heart fluttering around at 170 bpm.
I will say that it has calmed my worries a bit but I still worry. I've been feeling sick off and on. One day I'm great, the next I can't tolerate food. I am noticing my taste is changing because I love sweets and now they taste too sweet. Today I started wearing a bella band. My jeans are really tight! I'm running out of pants to wear to work. Yikes! Hope the boss doesn't mind?

My husband was really sweet during the ultrasound. You could tell he was really proud of his little bean floating around.

Off to take a nap! I'm tired.