A few years ago, I used give my friend Shawn a ton of crap for “using her baby as an excuse to flake.” She knew I was kidding just a little. To make matters more complicated, Shawn’s husband was relocated and they moved to Salem. I’ve missed seeing Shawn (and even Sarah, now a toddler) so much lately. I am feeling horrible for even thinking/saying she used her baby as an excuse. Why? Oh, because I now know what she was going through because I’m now a master flaker – the flakiest roll in the bunch. My son and family are a priority.
Last minute plans, forget about it. Bring my kid to a 7 p.m. event? He goes to bed at 7 p.m. (and he totally is a fuss bucket from 5-7 p.m. I don’t’ want ppl to think I have an unruly child) Happy hour? I have to pick my son up at daycare each day since my husband is now working (which is a good thing) – oh and I can’t bring a kid to a bar! I’m a maybe for everything. Sorry folks, this is my life now.
I recently read a blog post that I completely felt could have been written by me and totally hit home.
As much as I love my son (and I wouldn’t change a thing, I love him so much), it is hard to not feel left out. I’m about quit twitter and Facebook for this reason. My day consists of getting up, going to the gym, getting ready for work, dropping kid at daycare, work, picking kid up from daycare, home, dinner, get kid ready for before, crash. By 8 p.m., I’m fast asleep. The weekends are spent cleaning, shopping.
Bottomline, the lack of girl time is getting me down. I’m lonely. I feel so uncool (I thought this stopped in high school). I miss going on weekends away. I miss shopping. And I really miss my friend Shawn.
You know what made up for all this feeling down and flakey crap? Walking into daycare yesterday to a little boy who smiled, held his arms up and said “Hi Momma.”
Then I started thinking, want to judge me for being a flake, go ahead. I’d rather be known as an awesome mother who is always there for their kid because that is where my life is right now. I'll save my magazine reading to naptime. I'll take my son to new restaurants with my husband (of course, at 5 p.m.). I'll get a sitter now and then. Sleep is overrated! I can sleep when I'm dead.
Right now, my family is all that matters. (So I'm going to stop feeling left out and just enjoy it because someday, that toddler will be grown-up and well, then I will have time to NOT be a flake).
[caption id="attachment_723" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Ben's bath beard"][/caption]